Homicide In The Garden

That's the title of the post I intended to write today. It was going to be a double homicide. And I was going to perpetrate it. In the end, though, I just couldn't go through with it. I hope the two near-victims appreciate the reprieve. More than that, I hope they redeem themselves; but I'm not holding my breath.

You see, last year was the first year I tried the much celebrated Sungold tomatoes. They produced well but, like most of last year's tomatoes, tasted watery because it rained all freaking summer last year (except the time I was away which was crazy hot and bone dry and, naturally, did in much of the garden. *sigh*). This year, I gave the Sungolds another chance. It's been a tense relationship from the start. They have severe B.O.

I tried to ignore it. I tried to be sympathetic. I hoped it would go away and be replaced by that lovely normal tomato smell. It didn't. It got worse. The other day when I touched one of the Sungold plants it made my hands reek. When I came inside, The Girl actually recoiled from the smell... after I had washed my hands twice. The relationship just seems headed down a dead end road. Even with the new garden bed, space is at a premium in my food plot. Everybody needs to pull their own weight and, I now realize, not offend the gardener.

But I couldn't pull them out. I haven't given them a fair trial. I would just be wrong.

So, I'll check freecycle for someone giving away hazmat gear and walk wide circles around this variety. I won't grow them again next year. And I'll no doubt spend an inordinate amount of time wondering what nutter of a plant breeder thought it would be cool to introduce to home gardens tomato plants that cause gardeners to smell like roadkill with a side of toxic waste.

Please also see Would You Eat This? I'm so curious to know!